Loving Through Expectations

Have you ever bought a gift for someone thinking it was the perfect thing and you imagined in your mind how they would react, the smile, the joy, and how that image made you so excited in giving them this gift? When you think of that time, did the image in your head play out exactly as you expected? Expectations really set us up for heartache, hurt feelings, disappointment, and many other emotions.

I had never really thought about expectations, I just knew I had used them most of my life in many different ways and areas of my life. Once I realized I was causing this hardship on myself, I took a look at what I had been doing, and it was then I could see what I never seen before or maybe never wanted to.. And that was how I created how someone should act, feel, or think to what I gave, did or said to them.

We can not expect anyone to react in the way we think they should, the way we created it in our mind, the way it makes us feel good. If you think about it we are really judging someone, which is not fair nor is it right, because truthfully, we are holding this goodness with expecting them to act in a certain way, which is absolutely unfair. If you are giving someone what you think is the perfect gift and their reaction does not meet what you felt it should be, how can you be mad at that person? Why has society been this way for so long and why don’t kids learn about this at school? I say this because once you loose expectations you actually feel free. Free to give, free to speak, free to be yourself without thinking about what others will say or do, because you are not creating some scenario that truly will never happen.

My golden rule is: do what makes you happy, don’t do anything that you don’t want to, and do NOT do it for praise or any other form of emotion. If you want to clean your house, clean it, for you, not for your family to say “wow the house looks great”, because they may notice, but they also may have many things on their minds and simply forget to say it.

Life is meant to live freely. Give from your heart, love with your heart, but do not expect anything from others, because that is not being or acting from love. Free yourself, you will be amazed! XO-Rach