Loving Through Divorce.
Divorce is different for each person, the reasons why, if kids are involved and so many other factors. It makes each journey unique, although the outcome is the same, there is an ending of a marriage. There is not a guidebook on how to act or think during this process, because when it comes to humans everyone reacts and feels differently about this decision. I know in my own experience it was pretty tough to Love Through this process at first, but I learned quickly I was not who I wanted to be nor acting the way I wanted. So I changed a lot and in doing so I found love and that is how I could move forward in this journey.
As humans we live in our emotions, which is not always a bad thing, but it depends on the emotions we are living in. If you are feeling anger and hate, that is how you will navigate any experience in life and with divorce that only fuels the fires that may be burning in one or both people. Believe me I am aware of these feelings, the feeling of someone hating you so much because you chose to make yourself happy, but what I want you to understand it is not your job to carry someones pain or suffering, that is for them to heal and navigate through. Divorce is like death, it is an ending and in all endings you need to carry love, for yourself and for everyone involved. When you have kids this magnifies the need for love more than anything! Their whole entire life is changed and it doesn’t matter the age of your kids, because it is an ending of a family they have known their entire life. I became very aware of how my kids each felt, because they are all different and each path is different on how they processed this life changing event. My vow since day one was not to allow my kids to feel it was about them and that I was here, presently, loving and supporting them in all ways that I could.
Divorce is not easy, but it can be a beautiful thing even if you do not have a good ending with your ex. To be happy, healthy and in love with life is what each of us in this lifetime deserves and is meant to experience. Never feel bad about your choices, but also be aware of your why’s and what you are sending out into the world.
Love is the one gift we all have and even in the dark and sometimes horrible moments, when we feel we don’t or shouldn’t give love, that is when it is needed the most! XO-Rach